Happily Ever After

One of those days

Posted on: August 27, 2007

Sunday was one of those days. A day where I break down and cry. I thought I was doing ok up until yesterday. I was/am hoping that my break will make my days easier and make my tears come less often.

We went to visit my husbands family (as we do every Sunday) and I realized yet again how different I am from them. I feel differently on just about every subject. I also often feel that as much as they love Jon and I they are so willing to jump up to help others when they are in need but when it comes to my infertility and my mood swings they expect me to forget about it and go on with life. To not let it run my life. Where is the compassion? I realize that my mood swings (which happen a LOT less now) are not easy to deal with but you’d think they they would show a little compassion. It’s like to them my infertility is nothing. My husbands step mom tried for a year to get pregnant. I’m sorry but that in no way even compares to what I’ve been through. That is like me trying to compare myself to someone that has tried for 4+ years. The infertility treatments in and of it self is a whole different expierience.

I’m just sad. I know his family loves us. I’m just so sad on the inside. All I want is for my family to show they love me…to ask how I’m doing once in a while. To show they are interested…to ask me if I need anything the day I go in for my egg retrievals. I’m in pain for days after I get an egg retrieval. Last time I even had them over and cooked them dinner. Man did I suffer for that. I was in pain for 4 days because I didn’t listen to the doctor and stay in bed that day.

I’m just in a slump. I know I will pull myself out of it. I’m just having a pitty me party for a few days.

I’m going to acupuncture in an hour and I know it will help me feel better.

I suppose I should probably get some work done. I can’t seem to focus today at all!

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6 Responses to "One of those days"

I’m sorry you are having a rough couple of days. That’s got to be tough seeing your inlaws every week and not getting the support and acknowledgement that you deserve.Although, you are a step ahead of me. At least you are honest with your relatives. I don’t let my hubby tell his family about our infertity. Publicly, I’m in denial. Privately, I’m a wreck. Take it easy, Sweety.

I don’t blame you. I sometimes wish I hadn’t said a thing. Or at least given so much detail as to the treatments. How are you coming along with your blog. šŸ˜›

I am starting to think it is better to be open and honest. I am starting to feel like a liar when people ask me if we are going to have kids soon. I just say ‘oh ya, we’ll have to get working on that.’ Part of me thinks it is none of their business, but the other part is tired of acting so secretive like I’ve comitted a crime or something.Yes! I have started my blog. Come visit it.

My husband tells people “we are working on it” or something to that effect. Luckily people have never asked any further questions. With family however I don’t think that answer would suffice. My suggestion would be to tell them but not any details. That way they know you are trying but you don’t have to tell them exactly what kind of infertility treatments you are or have done.

That is a good point to tell them and just not be too specific. I’m glad to hear that most people are nice enough to not followup with lots of questions.–That’s what I’ve been afraid of.I am not sure if my blog address came up or not. It is http://diaperdreams.blogspot.com/

The only people I’d be worried about asking questions would be family and or close friends. Maybe think of some things you can say in response to questions they might ask. Then again I can’t imagine them asking questions at all.

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